gaijin shit and giggles

the following is a complete transcription of the first email sent to me by a crass "warlike" person who happens to be a close and personal friend who someday i will meet. please enjoy this in bad taste:

Hey fuckel
how was the lide to Talkiyo, Jipand(Tokyo, Japan)?
Keiko was wondeling if evelything went smoothry,
we leceived an emair flom geolge and he was
terring us that the typoons in Jipand wele pletty
sevele okuwaka was hit pletty bad and terr yoko
we said herro oh and my filst day of schoor was
quite the suck fest
i met a bunch of people but learry didn't enjoy it
the selved pizza and tested a new fravol of
fluitopia on us i lefused to have any of it and
what is with the teachels? thele they seem to be
on twenty-foul houl adveltisment mode constantry
terring us to go to aboveglound ol cully's fol oul
alt supplies.
anyways enough with my compraining i wirr talk
to you ratel terr me how you ale
bye bye
chad

FUCK ART!!! RET'S KIRR!!!"(FUNNY ENOUGH MOST
PEOPLE DIDN'T NOTICE OL JUST COMPRETERY
IGNOLED THE PIN BUT I DID GET A COUPRE OF
GIGGRES FLOM SOME PEOPRE)

PS KEIKO SAYS YOU ALE A CIGALETTE THIEF AND
THAT IT WAS A GOOD THING THAT SHE POISONED
THE LICE BALLS....